Dear Diary

Thankgod! He actually spoke to me! He listened, gave me a chance to explain myself and then forgave me! Is he not the most amazing boyfriend ever? Okaay, yeah i was bitching about him earlier, but oh my god, i'm so in love with him and i never stopped loving him :) uhhh So Happy :D

He's so understanding. He gave me a proper gooey feeling today, loved it. He told me he'll love me till the day he dies and he aint going no where and that he's never going to be able to bring himself to leave and how he wants me for the rest of his life. I was like awwwwwww! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH :D okaay am so happy right now :D Hahaaaaa. Seriously i love him so much, i thought he was going to dump me. He never ever runs out of second chances, i love him so much. I am so in love.

.Ox

Dear Diary

Okaay, I've messed this up big time! I love him and i lied to him so that this guy, one that i did "stuff" with months before we even met, wouldn't come up in conversation. Yet he went out of his way to find out i was lying. I stupidly lied and i got hurt. My lie hurt me. He wont talk to me, answer my texts, my calls or what ever. I sat here crying my eyes out. All because i lied to try not to hurt him and i hurt myself. It's funny how that works really isn't it. Kind of strange. I hate myself so much at the moment. It's not Fair, why do i always mess things up like this, seriously :( Okaay, well i don't know what to do. I love him so much, my mates are saying give him time, give him space, but last time i did that we both ended up nearly committing suicide! So yeah, not to good. I do not know what to do :( Help Me Please!

.Ox

Dear Diary

Ok, I'm in love with my boyfriend and my best friend hates him. What do i do? She's telling me to choose between her and him. That's harsh, because she's been my mate for 12years now, but I'm in love with him and she really don't realise that. I don't get why she hates him so much or what he has even done wrong. It's not fair on any of us to be perfectly honest. Especially me cause I'm stuck between two of the most important people in my life. Seriously what do i do? She is such a self centred cow!!! I can't believe she is making me do this, i seriously can't. It's not fair :( I've been so happy for the past few weeks and then she goes and does this. It's like she is trying to split us up, seriously. What do you think? Any help would be really appreciated right now.

I suppose i have my summer to look forward to. Except from the fact i was meant to go on holiday with the two of them. That will be interesting :/ I just have to sort things with him first, will probably be easier as he actually sees where I'm coming from whereas my mate doesn't. Everything and i seriously mean everything has to be her way. She is the most, hypercritical, selfish, self centred, bitch i know!

Thank you for reading :)

& Please help, please :(

.Ox

Dear Diary

Ohh my god, ii just realiised how amaziing my boyfriiend actually iis. :D ii am so fuckiing iin love wiith hiim atm :) seriiously. Ermm, yeahh not alot goiing on tbh, ughh, ii am so totally iin love wiith hiim :D thankyouu babyy :) Awhhh :) ii love youuuuuu sooooooo much :D Ohh my god thiis iis amaziing. School has been good for a change, ii mean and we onlyy have untiil friiday, whats that, 4 dayys :D :o woooo! :D No gossiip at all, not liike me not to have any :/ sooo yeahh......Well seeiing as ii don't have much else to say ii better go :D

Byee Byee

.Ox

Dear Diary

. So, my first diary entry. What do i tell you? About, the gossip? my feelings? my friends? my boyfriend? my school? Theres so much to tell! Erm, so lets think. I'll just go for it, Hahaa.

My Boyfriend, he is the most amazing person i know, and yet he obsesses over the smallest things, i love him so much but he is so protective. My friends are saying i'm not happy and they can tell, but the thing is, i'm only not happy when i'm not talking to him, and thats becuase we argue everytime right before he goes. Hmm, think i might have to tell him, lol. Ohh my best mate is also panicing cause i'm a virgin and she thinks he is going to be expecting alot of me over the next few weeks. I mean yeahh we've done stuff, but not gone all the way. And, not sure when or if we will tbh. Will have to see what happens wont we :D Hahaa.

Today, school was crap tbh, and i aint going to talk about it, Hahaa, ermm. yeahh today i argued with my boyfreind, again... Ohh, this aint gunna stop isit :/ will talk to him in the morning, given him time to think and vent, lol.

Okaay, well i know i haven't really said much, but its 11:00pm and i'm trying to watch big brother do my cwrk and write this at the same time, so i think im going to go. Hahaa. Night people :)

xx